“Before and during I am fine but after it feels like death.”

What happens to all your energy? And why does it feel like death?


Someone commented this on a video I posted on Tiktok:

“Before and during I am fine but after it feels like death.”

This person was referring to how they feel after their menstrual cycle, but most people living in survival (aka with stress and trauma) can relate to this on some level. The ups and extreme downs: one day feeling fine, the next feeling like a buffalo herd stomped all over you and not being able to get back up. Many people spend their days, their life, feeling like they’re dying.

That’s how I felt for many years. I felt like I was going to rot away in bed. I just could not get up. My body was too heavy to move and simple tasks felt like too much effort. Not much got done during this time of my life.


So where does all the energy go?

Imagine fighting for your life 24/7. Because that’s what your body’s doing if you’re living in survival. It doesn’t matter if your rational mind tells you, “you’re fine”– you can’t trick nature. This is why I cringe when western proclaimed experts and mainstream media beat around the bush with their self-care lists and “it’s-all-in-your-mind” — statements.

First, it doesn’t help anyone. At least not in the long run. Second, it makes people (like me years ago) feel like they are lazy or not trying hard enough.

I bet there are millions of people out there, maybe you’re one of them, who think they’re introverts who just “don’t enjoy” being out there in the world, participating in life, when in reality, they’re just tapped out from living in survival. And no amount of positive affirmations, pep talks, and bath salts are going to help with that.

The exhaustion; the need to isolate, and the reason why it feels like death, is because people are taught to control their natural responses instead of letting them run their course and leave the body.

You know how after some time, dams start to break because of all the pressure? That’s what’s happening to people in Western societies. All that stress and trauma just held inside of people, tight tight tight. If you feel like you’re dying, or so exhausted that you can barely get out of bed, it’s because there’s an active survival response stuck in your body and it’s taking all of your energy.

Survival responses can come from so many different experiences, for e.g. menstrual cycles, pregnancy, birth, grief, sadness, fear, anger, or a stressful/scary/traumatic situation. These are natural processes and part of our existence as human beings. The survival response is your body’s way to help you through them. But what is not natural and should not be part of your life is living with these survival energies (hormones). This is why we see imbalances with people, and our society, in general.

Everything we’re exposed to today; it’s like being constantly under attack. And then on top of that, add all the skewed ideas of what healing is and how to control and “manage” your symptoms.

I love recipes but this makes one toxic dish that will take people out, one by one.


Here’s what’s supposed to happen:

  1. A tun (translates to experience) starts.
    This could be any natural process: menstruation, pregnancy, stressful situation, etc.
  2. After the tun is over, the cycle finishes by letting the survival energies leave your body
  3. Your body can now rest and heal up

After this, you’re ready to get out there again and take on the world. It’s like hitting the reset button.

The problem is that a lot of people don’t know this. Especially if you’ve only been taught the beliefs and perspectives of an industrialized society, it’s very likely that you stay stuck in the tun. In the experience with the survival response. That means you never get a chance to rest up and heal. So when a new process starts, maybe another period, or something new and stressful happens, it just piles on like water adds pressure to the walls of a dam.

I’m sure you already understand that this is not a natural state to live in. You can feel it. That’s why it feels like death when in reality, you should be feeling alive.


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